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In my last post, I shared how believing "God is", is the first step of faith. But, if you're like me, you've struggled at times with Him being there. Perhaps, you've prayed with little or no results for a time. Or maybe, you've been praying for an important answer to your prayer or you needed supernatural guidance, only to be met with silence.
I've been there, and have experienced those things. So, don't feel you're alone in experiencing the silence or that you're a lesser human being or citizen of the Kingdom of God. At different times, we've all experienced that silence, that leads us to ask "God, where are you?".
This wasn't the only time or the last time I've experienced God's silence, but several years ago I was struggling with it. Everyone had gone to bed and I was alone in the living room. I sat on the floor to pray and see if God would speak to me through His written word.
I prayed a simple prayer that night. I simply prayed, "Lord, please reveal yourself to me". I was expecting for God to reveal Himself to me little by little, over time. I wasn't expecting what happened next.
Shortly after I prayed that prayer, I felt a sensation like a wave flowing over me. As this wave flowed over me, I sensed and felt immense joy. I was close to laughing as this joy flowed over me.
That wave left me. Then I sensed another stronger wave flowing over me. As this wave came, I began praying lost souls. This wasn't some general, nebulous prayer I was praying. Specific names of specific people were coming to my mind, one after the other. I automatically began praying for them to receive salvation through Christ. Name after name came into my mind.
Not only names, but for some people I saw faces as I was praying for them. One name after the other.
I've been there, and have experienced those things. So, don't feel you're alone in experiencing the silence or that you're a lesser human being or citizen of the Kingdom of God. At different times, we've all experienced that silence, that leads us to ask "God, where are you?".
This wasn't the only time or the last time I've experienced God's silence, but several years ago I was struggling with it. Everyone had gone to bed and I was alone in the living room. I sat on the floor to pray and see if God would speak to me through His written word.
I prayed a simple prayer that night. I simply prayed, "Lord, please reveal yourself to me". I was expecting for God to reveal Himself to me little by little, over time. I wasn't expecting what happened next.
Shortly after I prayed that prayer, I felt a sensation like a wave flowing over me. As this wave flowed over me, I sensed and felt immense joy. I was close to laughing as this joy flowed over me.
That wave left me. Then I sensed another stronger wave flowing over me. As this wave came, I began praying lost souls. This wasn't some general, nebulous prayer I was praying. Specific names of specific people were coming to my mind, one after the other. I automatically began praying for them to receive salvation through Christ. Name after name came into my mind.
Not only names, but for some people I saw faces as I was praying for them. One name after the other.
After a time, this wave began to leave me. Shortly, I sensed another wave coming upon me. This wave was stronger than the first two. When this wave came over me, I felt something I had never felt before in my life. I had known the loss of both of my parents. I also had known the loss of three grandparents. But, what I felt with this third wave, was something I've never experienced.
When this wave came over me, I was feeling a deeply heartfelt, gut wrenching grief. This was grief I was feeling welling up from deep within me. I ended with my face to the floor quietly crying. I had never felt any grief like this grief. It was deep, from within the depths of my soul. As I was experiencing this, the scripture came to my mind from Ephesians 4:30. "And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God.
This wave began to leave. Another wave came over me. Each wave was stronger than the one before it. With this next wave, I felt like a little child on the lap of my Daddy. I actually sat there on the floor, wrapping my arms around me as if my Daddy were hugging me and I was hugging him. I was experiencing God as my Father, my Daddy.
That wave left me and an even stronger wave came over me. When this wave came, I fell flat, with my face to the floor. I knew, without a doubt, that I was in the room with royalty. I was experiencing God as King. This wave was so strong, I had to ask God to please stop. I couldn't withstand another wave. Each successive wave was stronger.
This last wave left me. Then I looked around the room. The waves were gone. Everything in the room looked the same and familiar. But, I was still sensing God's presence in that room. He had revealed Himself to me, like I asked.
The first step of faith, is to believe that God is. Without truly believing God is, that He is truly there, you and I can't take any more steps toward faith. And it's impossible to please God without faith.
If you are struggling with this, it's okay. As I did, simply ask God to reveal Himself to you. He may not do it as dramatically with you. He may do it more dramatically. He may do it right away. Or me may do it over the course of time. But, God will reveal Himself to you.
Then you can take that first step from fear, knowing God is, and begin to step into faith.
When this wave came over me, I was feeling a deeply heartfelt, gut wrenching grief. This was grief I was feeling welling up from deep within me. I ended with my face to the floor quietly crying. I had never felt any grief like this grief. It was deep, from within the depths of my soul. As I was experiencing this, the scripture came to my mind from Ephesians 4:30. "And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God.
This wave began to leave. Another wave came over me. Each wave was stronger than the one before it. With this next wave, I felt like a little child on the lap of my Daddy. I actually sat there on the floor, wrapping my arms around me as if my Daddy were hugging me and I was hugging him. I was experiencing God as my Father, my Daddy.
That wave left me and an even stronger wave came over me. When this wave came, I fell flat, with my face to the floor. I knew, without a doubt, that I was in the room with royalty. I was experiencing God as King. This wave was so strong, I had to ask God to please stop. I couldn't withstand another wave. Each successive wave was stronger.
This last wave left me. Then I looked around the room. The waves were gone. Everything in the room looked the same and familiar. But, I was still sensing God's presence in that room. He had revealed Himself to me, like I asked.
The first step of faith, is to believe that God is. Without truly believing God is, that He is truly there, you and I can't take any more steps toward faith. And it's impossible to please God without faith.
If you are struggling with this, it's okay. As I did, simply ask God to reveal Himself to you. He may not do it as dramatically with you. He may do it more dramatically. He may do it right away. Or me may do it over the course of time. But, God will reveal Himself to you.
Then you can take that first step from fear, knowing God is, and begin to step into faith.
