You love God. You feel like you have faith. But things just aren't manifesting for you. God's blessings aren't appearing. You can't seem to attract Kingdom favor.
You're trying to believe but your frustrated.
In the gospel of Matthew is a story you may be able to identify with. I sure have many times. The story can be found in Matthew chapter 9, verses 14-24.
Peter, James and John had spent time on a mountain, where they saw Jesus transfigured before them. I would imagine it was a very powerful experience for them. That would sure put one on a spiritual high.
Then they came back. The story says they saw a large crowd around the disciples. Then it goes on to say when the crowd saw Jesus, they began running to greet Him. And He asked the people, what were you discussing with them (meaning His disciples)?
Then one of the crowd, who had a demon possessed son, told Him that he brought his son to the disciples for the demon to be cast out, but they couldn't do it. Jesus then rebuked the disciples for their lack of faith and had the father bring the boy to Him.
He brought the boy to Jesus and when Jesus saw Him, the demon spirit threw the boy into convulsion and falling to the ground, he began rolling around and foaming at the mouth.
Jesus asked the father how long the boy had been like that and his father responded that it had been since childhood.
The father then made a crucial request. "...if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us."
Then Jesus answered him with a very powerful statement followed by an equally powerful response by the father.
Jesus answered the father with the following statement: "'If you can!' All things are possible to him who believes.
Isn't this most often how we respond and think? "If I can do this" or "if I can do that", "I'm not sure if I can."
But what did Jesus say? "ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE TO HIM(OR SHE) WHO BELIEVES".
What was Jesus also saying? He was telling the father that the "if you can" is based in fear and unbelief.
How did the father answer Jesus? He told Him, "I do believe; help my unbelief." The father was conflicted. Have you ever felt that way? I know I have. He believed Jesus could. But he was unsure as to whether Jesus could do it for his son.